We never know.
That morning

I kept my hand
+++on our ailing cat’s belly
+++as he purred.

In communion with him
+++even while
+++grief tore through me.

Some say not to borrow grief
+++before time
+++but to
+++stay in the moment.

Yet
+++in this very moment
+++even while he and I
+++are bonding

My body
+++is also collapsing
+++with grief.

Why should I choose?

I do
+++both.

Image: “He’s still here,” by Mike Shell (7/26/2021). See also “Shadow: grief and matri.”